Reflections of a 30 Year Old

Happy Birthday to me, happy birthday to me! Yes that is right on Monday I turned 31 years old (was very spoilt too) and incredibly have a lot to reflect on in this past year that saw me enter my thirties. There were a lot of highs and lows, a lot of tears and a lot of laughs.

Should I start with the highs or the lows first? Let's begin with the low so that we end on a high.

The lowest point saw me become someone I did not recognise when I looked in the mirror. Normally I am a very easy going, in control person however this past year I was anything but this. I won't go to much into as you can read all about it here. In short I am not all that in control when it comes to being a mum to two young children and a wife to a husband that works away Monday to Friday.

Not only did this cause major issues with the sort of mother I was being, a cranky, fly of the handle type but it was detrimental to my marriage too. If I had not sought the help I did, in the way of medication, I can say with some certainty that my husband would have had great cause to leave me and take the children. But I did, I did get help and am slowly climbing back up and discovering part of my old self while forging new habits a long the way.

Another major blow during the year was losing my Aunty Marilyn, unexpectedly. She was my second mum growing up. She is the reason I love to be crafty and why I love to put so much effort into hosting kick arse parties. I don't do it to be pretentious; I do it because I LOVE IT. I love being unique and creative, it is as simple as that. Something I heard my mum say this past weekend as we celebrated Lil Guy's 1st birthday is "Aunty Marilyn will never be gone" and that is true I will carry on being creative and will try to pass on that to my children in her memory.

Aunty Marilyn and I had my Year 12 formal in 1998

Hubby also lost his uncle unexpectedly and this really hit home that with our years passing so are our parents. I didn't know when that child like fantasy that our parents are immortal would fade but given these two major losses to our family it has caused that fantasy to crumble. Already my father has had a close call with his heart and thankfully he is still here to see his grandchildren grow. I just wish my parents, all three of them, would stop and enjoy life a little more. They all work far too much.

So those were the lows, not too many but the few that occurred, they were major to us as a family and I am so thankful to be past them. We shall never forget those who have left us but we will mourn them happily and not dwell on why they were taken to early. As for my own mental anguish I will continue to fight through it and teach myself to be the mother and wife I long to be.

On to the highs, some are major and some are simply just trivial milestones that I am proud to have made;

One day after I had my 30th birthday we was thrilled to welcome our son into this world. I knew as soon as he arrived that our lil fam was complete. His birth wasn't as perfect as his sister's but it was not as traumatic as many others experience. Due to my own fault we spent most of the first 24 hours a part due to his low blood sugar. Short story, I had Gestational Diabetes with both pregnancies. First time I managed it like a pro but still had to have insulin. Second time I was more relaxed and fought to stay off the insulin which resulted in my poor baby being hooked up to an IV drip. As I said things could have been much worse and in hind sight I am so grateful that was our only mountain to conquered.

Image taken by Sara Rosetta Photography

Something most of you will not know and really until now have no reason to have known is that I had an irrational fear of driving. It was not until 2010 and moving to a quite coastal town that I got the nerve to even get behind the wheel for any period of time. Previously living in an overpopulated tourist city had me so petrified that even thinking of driving had me to the point of a panic attack. In February 2011, just 7 months shy of turning 30 I went for my driving test and PASSED first go! So that was one major but trivial milestone I achieved that I am exceptional pleased with myself for too.

Hubby quit the job he took to move us up here and has started a Mature Age Apprenticeship. Now yes it has put us into a bit of a spin financially considering he is the sole income earner and that income has now halved but we are managing. This apprenticeship will secure our future and allow us the freedom we have longed for, financially.

Seeing Lil Miss flourish into a bright intelligent child is also among the highs. She has really lost that toddler look and is now turning into a beautiful young girl who next year starts Kindergarten and then onto Prep at school, wow that spins me out. She and Lil Guy are truly the best thing to wake up every morning, even if it is a reluctant wake up and often before the sun has risen.

Image taken by myself for Alex&Grace Designs

Friendships, now I still haven't covered this with it's own post but let me just say close, long standing friendships are not something I can say I have. Don't get me wrong there are a few I call long term friends and miss them dearly now that we live so far a part but we are not as close as to call each other and chat for hours. I think technology has a lot to do with though as really we have no need to discuss what is happening in our lives when it is posted in the way of Facebook status updates and Instagram photos for all to see at their leisure. Back to where I was getting with this high, this past year I have really grown close to a few lovely ladies here where we live and I am so grateful to them even though they probably do not realise or even know why. Their friendship and support this past year means the world to me and I will be forever grateful no matter where our lives take up in the future.

So there is it my year as a 30 year old in short form and now to sit, quietly and reflect on how I want my 31st year to go.

Be sure to check back soon for a run down on Lil Guy's 1st birthday party and our hoard of visitors this past week. Here is a little sneak peak;

Wordy Wednesday

Now I am going against the grain here and forever claim today as Wordy Wednesday not Wordless Wednesday. 

Why? You ask. 

Well simply put I want to express how I am feeling this week with images I have found on the web and they contain words so hence why today can not remain as Wordless Wednesday.

Image found on Pinterest (of course), original source unknown (as usual).

Original Source Zen and Living Simply, blog post has been deleted.

Image found on Pinterest (of course), original source unknown (as usual).

The Circus Is In Town

This past Saturday I took Miss Hara to her first CQ Circus School lesson. She LOVED it and is busting to go back in a couple of weeks.

Today I thought I would share some of the photos I took on my iPhone. Please excuse the quality of the photos was very difficult getting good shots while the kids were constantly on the move.

Miss Hara was lucky enough to have two of her best friends, Miss N and Miss K there too.

 

 Miss Hara is a great little dancer but her co-ordination needs a bit of work before she starts dance classes next year. Circus School is perfect for that as it will help her with balancing and hand-eye co-ordination too.

 

This one is a bit of an action shot of Miss K using the hoolahop.

 Of course Lil Guy had a ball as well just walking, crawling and climbing all over the place.

This photo isn't the best but I just had to share as I love the face she is pulling.

My two kidlets getting up to no good.

All the girls loved having a turn on the aerial ropes. After they had a little climb, they got to sit in them and swing around before emerging as beautiful butterflies.

Miss N as a beautiful butterfly.

If anyone lives in Central Queensland, Jacinta holds classes in both Rockhampton and Yeppoon. You can find out more details by visiting her Facebook page, CQ Circus School.

I am linking up to

Organising The Chaos!

Since being on the mediation (see Caution: Emotional Pile Up In Progress) I am reconnecting with my inner Neat Freak.

One of my major hang ups at the height of my depression was the chaos around me. It caused me to have major anxiety issues and our home became a dumping ground. There was piles of crap everywhere. Whenever I got the urge to do something about it I would take one look around and be so overwhelmed I would slink back to the couch to procrastinate about it some more, hence never actually getting around to it.

Within a week of starting the anti depression meds I was on fire organising left, right and centre. I got quite a lot accomplished and it felt amazing, so liberating. Though it was short lived as once hubby was sent away for work again I allowed the house to crumble in a heap, myself along with it. I picked myself back up again and found The Organised Housewife's 20 Days to Organise and Clean Your Home Challenge. Some of what Katrina has in the pre challenge tasks I already have in place some what. Thanks to the timing of this challenge though I am working on make our routines more concrete and finally getting back to having this house run like a well oiled machine. Here some are photos of what I had done prior (sorry I neglected to take before photos) to the challenge beginning;

 

In our kitchen we have two large deep drawers, in the bottom one I keep all the baking trays etc. Before the meds (B.M) this draw was a disaster. 

Thanks to some nifty plate stackers from Kmart for all of about $5 each I was able to stack a lot of the trays and pans.

B.M. the plates and bowls would slide all over the place in the top draw. They slide no more with the use of a Kmart plate stacker for our plates and a Can Shelf for the kidlets bowls and plates. 

A nice tidy (aka OCD Neat Freak) oragnise pantry is the result of a Facebook Free Weekend (FFW). I am in love with our great is and I have done so much more baking since. I really should take recent photo as this was also taken prior to my Clean Eating : My Way.

Once again B.M. I had rushed out and bought whiteboards and corkboards but never got around to putting them up. They both need a nice coat of bright paint and it's on the TO DO LIST, I promise. This is such a handy little area to have in an other wise big wasted space next to the fridge and above the garage bin.

Keep watching for more posts on Clean Eating and of the 20 Day Organise and Clean Your Home Challenge by TOH!

I've been cooking!!!!

Not too long ago I stumbled across Wholesome Cook, via Itty Bitty Bites Brisbane, and I was blown away by the fact that Martyna had a fantastically awesome e-Cookbook, My Whole Food Philosophy, available free for a short period. I mean in this day and age there is not much that is free in this life and after being stiffed by a dodgy clean eating "diet plan", not so long ago, I was just amazed that Wholesome Cook was being so generous. You can now buy this e-Cookbook for only $6.99, here and if you use promo code: nomorejunk you will receive a whopping 30% off!

Back to the reason for my post, currently Martyna is running a Blogger Comp running where she is offering a $100 Amazon voucher up for grabs and all you have to do to enter is blog about cooking from her e-Cookbook. How could I not try to win such a great prize when I have been keen to cook one, actually all of, her recipes since I downloaded the book.

After flicking back and forth I decided to go with one of the more easier recipes and boy am I glad I did as I did not pick a fantastic night. Normally hubby and I work in sync with each other, one baths the kidlets while the other cooks (and normally washes the day's dishes).  Not last night, last night hubby was installing a new radiator in our car so it was up to me to bath and cook. Anyway I picked the Baked Spring Rolls and they were YUMMO!

I apologise now for the terrible photos, as mentioned before I was in a bit of a rush.

 Of course I took the more convenient route and went with store bought BBQ Chook. I have never cooked with Duck however I fully intend to give it a go soon though. With the BBQ Chook I decided to combine the Vegan option and add the Rainbow Salad mix. As was no surprise to me, hubby wasn't able to get Rainbow Salad mix at our local Woolsworth so it was the Fine Coleslaw mix, containing a bright mix of Cabbage and Carrot. Still a very tasty combo with a few added Coriander leaves.

To serve with the spring rolls I had store bought Sweet Chilli Sauce and homemade Honey-Lime Dipping Sauce from shape.com. The sauce was so simple to use and was very tasty.

TIP: When working with Spring Roll paper be sure to keep the paper sheets on a damp tea towel as not to dry them out. If they dry out, even a little, when it comes time to roll the spring rolls the paper will easily tear.

All in all I would recommend this recipe to anyone. My children (3.5 and 1 year old) scoffed them up with Lil Miss advising me that she would like them for her kindy lunch next week, awwww.

I really hope you check out Wholesome Cook. Martyna has so many other delicious looking recipes on her site that are not in the e-Cookbook, such as the most recent; Chilli and Beer Barbecue Pork Ribs which I know hubby will be itching for me to make.

Putting My Big Girl Panties On!!!

Yesterday we found out we need to replace the radiator in our car, something we only just did almost 14 months ago not to mention an expense we do not need right now. We have Lil Guy's 1st birthday party in a week plus registration for the car is due at the same time. Not to mention the heartache recently of loved ones leaving us far too soon and unexpectingly.

Of course the first thing I did was sit on the lounge and get lost in my own little online world. All the while pigging out on salty, fatty, sugary foods. I had my little outbursts, the way of Facebook status updates, for all my friends and family too see of course.

By late afternoon, after looking around the house and seeing the chaos as well as looking down to see Lil Guy tugging on my leg for attention, I realised I had to snap out of it and fast. It really scared me how one minor set back in the big scheme of things saw me nose dive into a depressive state.

So this morning I woke up with a clear mind and got back on the horse with my Big Girl Panties on, ready to tackle life head on. I think the universe sensed this and rewarded us with a much cheaper option on getting our car on the road again this weekend.

Now I have spent far too much time online already today so I am off to get a real start on The Organised Housewife's 20 Days to Organise and Clean Your Home Challenge.

My Week On Instagram!

For the past couple of weeks I have been linking up with Kimberly from A Night Owl for her Instagram Blog Hop. She runs weekly Instagram Blog Hops with the help of several co-hosts and is joined by many bloggers.

As I am a bit of (ok, ok a lot of) an Instagram junkie I jumped at joining in, because really I do need more excuses to be on Instagram hahaha NOT.

I thought from now on I will do a weekly roundup of my favourite Instagram pics I have taken throughout the past week to share with those who might not be on Instagram or just not following me (come on follow me PLEASSSSE @sewingmywebb).

The one above, I took while trying to organise our walkin robe/computer room. After pulling down a few nappies boxes, that were full of CRAP, I came across Tigger and Elmo in a very compromising position. So of course I had to instagram it for the world to see what these devious little fellas get up to when they think no one is watching.

Lil Guy is such the typical little boy and every chance he gets he tries to escape from inside. Seriously he will dart out the garage if he realises the roller door is up.  I am thinking of letting him go free range with the chickens when we get them.

At the end of last week a couple of my good friends, who live in the same street, weren't coping so well. As you do when you have two young children to look after by yourself for a week at a time while hubby is off working (been there, done that and still doing that much to my dislike). So when I saw one of these friends post that she had been up all night with her daughter who had caught a stomach bug I immediately thought "what can I do to brighten her day just a little?" Of course the answer had to be COFFEE and BAKED GOODS!!!! So I threw the kidlets in the car, raced into town and picked up these bad boys and, ever so sneakily, left their Survival Packs where they would find them.

These pretties were me getting setup to take part in The Organised Housewife's 20 Days To Organise & Clean Challenge. What won't shock you is that that is as far as I have gotten. Now 5 days later and I have managed to sort my binder but neither write down routines or start on the daily challenges. So yeah you could say I am doing real well at this one. I do promise though to do a post, or two, about my accomplishments in this challenge. I am evening planning on designing my first printables for my readers YAY!!

Have I told you how much I love my Lil Fam!!! On Saturday hubby and the kidlets took me to Harvey Norman (large furniture and appliance chain here in Australia). Where I was allowed to buy a coffee machine as a my birthday present (shhh it's on the 17th, how lucky am I to get it so early). I have been wanting a Nespresso machine for ages. Hubby was a bit dubious about getting me one though. Several years ago he bought me a different type of machine which I hardly used. Come on though, it required far too much cleaning for my liking and well I just wasn't that great at heating or frothing the milk. The Nespresso, you see, requires a good water descale once every 6 - 8 months and no coffee grinds to clean out. No milk frother spout to wipe clean, no 10,000 pieces to pull apart and wash after each use. Anyway I LOVE MY LIL FAM AND MY NEW NESPRESSO U!!!!!! I highly recommend getting one if you love your coffee!

"Look my mum has new pretty shoes" This is Miss Hara's favourite thing right now, SHOES!!! Of course I am not helping her shoe fetish by loving all the bright flats available right now.

On Sunday it was Father's Day here in Australia. For my wonderful hubby the kidlets and I bought him a hand stamped leather braid wrist band from Love n Cherish (no idea if that is actually what is called but calling it a bracelet doesn't seem right), Miss Hara made a lovely necktie necklace at daycare which hubby proudly wore all day, even to the supermarket and I put together our own little version of Cold Rock (an ice cream shop that squishes lollies/candy into the ice cream). We miss Cold Rock so much. In the kit was a marble board with two paddle for preparing the delicious combos and I filled spice bottles with M&Ms, Skittles, Caramel Popcorn, Choc Coated Peanuts, Maltesers and Gummi Bears. We had a great day, just the four of us. I cooked up a storm in the kitchen, literally all day.

Yesterday my new very Shabby Chic iPad case arrived. Gosh I love it to bits! I am becoming addicted to cases though, I now have three.

Strawberries must be growing crazy like here right now as our supermarkets are selling them at $1.25 per punnet. We stocked up as our kidlets can't eat enough of them and I also wanted to puree some for those months when they are $7 per punnet and I say a big "Hell No" to pay that much. We plan on planting our own before next harvest season. I plan on making yummy daiquiris at my belated 30th party in a couple of weeks.I am actually turning 31 but seeing I was in early labour on my real 30th I think I deserve a do over.

Just Cause

Lately, all round me, I seem to come across e-posters on the web (no not my Webb but the "web", you know the Interweb) and so thought I would share some with you on this lovely Spring day.

Now this first one is me all over. All but one of these tendencies is oh so true about the kind of person I am. Of course as you probably no from my previous rants the one thing on the list I can say is most definitely not me, in any way, shape or form, is 10) Motivate themsevles. Umm yeah no, self motivation would actually have to be on of the biggest thing I lack and that I dislike (note: I try not to hate rather dislike when possible) about myself. On this rediscovery I hope to change this about myself.

Found on Pinterest, source unknown but list, not image, came from 12most.com

Ok so this one I found almost immediately after my "Flight of Fancy" post last week when Iwas really thinking hard about who I am and who I want to be. One major thing I want to change about myself is my insecurities when it comes to friendships. Now I am not going to go into it too much in this post as this issues alone is worthy of its' own post. 

Found on Pinterest, uploaded by user. Original image source unknown.

Now I am a very creative person however I can not say I have a special talent but I am most definitely passionately curious about a lot of things in this world.

Found on Pinterest from Tumblr. Original image source unknown.

Alright last one and this one really does not require much of an explanation but really just sums up where I am right now; looking forwards not backwards!

Found on Pinterest, uploaded by user. Original image source unknown.

x Renee